The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Make Your Loved Ones' Lives Easier and Your Own Life More Pleasant

The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Make Your Loved Ones' Lives Easier and Your Own Life More Pleasant

Margareta Magnusson

3.41(27080 readers)
A charming, practical, and unsentimental approach to putting a home in order while reflecting on the tiny joys that make up a long life.

In Sweden there is a kind of decluttering called döstädning, meaning “death” and städning meaning “cleaning.” This surprising and invigorating process of clearing out unnecessary belongings can be undertaken at any age or life stage but should be done sooner than later, before others have to do it for you. In The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, artist Margareta Magnusson, with Scandinavian humor and wisdom, instructs readers to embrace minimalism. Her radical and joyous method for putting things in order helps families broach sensitive conversations, and makes the process uplifting rather than overwhelming.

Margareta suggests which possessions you can easily get rid of (unworn clothes, unwanted presents, more plates than you’d ever use) and which you might want to keep (photographs, love letters, a few of your children’s art projects). Digging into her late husband’s tool shed, and her own secret drawer of vices, Margareta introduces an element of fun to a potentially daunting task. Along the way readers get a glimpse into her life in Sweden, and also become more comfortable with the idea of letting go.

Publisher

Scribner

Publication Date

1/2/2018

ISBN

9781501173257

Pages

224

Categories

About the Author

Margareta Magnusson

Margareta Magnusson

Margareta Magnusson is, in her own words, aged between 80 and 100. Born in Sweden, she has lived all over the world. Margareta graduated from Beckman's College of Design and her art has been exhibited in galleries from Hong Kong to Singapore. She has five children and lives in Stockholm. The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning is her first book.

(from publisher's website at http://www.simonandschuster.com/autho...)

Questions & Answers

The primary purpose of "Death Cleaning," or döstädning, is to systematically organize and declutter one's belongings before death, making it easier for loved ones to manage the estate. It differs from regular cleaning in that it involves a deeper, more thoughtful process of evaluating and disposing of items based on their value, sentiment, and practicality. Death cleaning is not just about tidiness; it's about making decisions about what to keep, give away, sell, or discard, often with a focus on simplifying life and reducing the burden on survivors. This process can also provide closure and a sense of accomplishment for the individual doing the cleaning.

Death cleaning benefits both individuals and their loved ones in several ways. For individuals, it's a therapeutic process that allows reflection on their life, memories, and the meaning of possessions. It can be emotionally challenging, but it also brings closure and a sense of peace. Practically, it simplifies living, reduces clutter, and can save time and money.

For loved ones, death cleaning is a gift. It minimizes the burden of sorting through a deceased person's belongings, saves time, and can prevent disputes over possessions. It also provides a clearer picture of the individual's life and values, which can be comforting and helpful in the grieving process.

The emotional aspect involves confronting memories and making difficult decisions about what to keep or discard. The practical aspect includes organizing, donating, selling, or discarding items, and ensuring that the individual's wishes are respected. Overall, death cleaning is a meaningful and respectful way to honor someone's life and legacy.

The key strategies for effective death cleaning include:

  1. Start Early: Begin downsizing and organizing as early as possible to avoid overwhelming tasks later.
  2. Sort and Categorize: Organize items into categories like clothes, books, and furniture. Start with easier categories and work your way to more difficult ones.
  3. Involve Others: Seek advice from friends or professionals for difficult decisions. Consider involving family members if they have the time.
  4. Be Practical: Keep only what is useful or holds sentimental value. Dispose of items that are unnecessary or no longer needed.
  5. Plan Your New Space: If downsizing, plan your new living space to ensure everything has a place.
  6. Document and Share: Keep records of your decisions and share them with loved ones to avoid confusion later.
  7. Be Mindful of Sentimental Items: Handle these items with care, reflecting on their significance before deciding what to do with them.

To begin, start with a category you feel comfortable with, like clothes, and sort them into piles: keep and discard. Gradually move to other categories, and remember to take breaks to avoid burnout.

The concept of death cleaning reflects broader societal values and trends in several ways:

  1. Consumerism: It challenges the idea of accumulating possessions, reflecting a move towards minimalism and sustainability. By decluttering, individuals contribute to reducing waste and the environmental impact of overconsumption.

  2. Environmentalism: It aligns with environmental concerns by promoting recycling and donating items, which helps reduce the strain on landfills and encourages a circular economy.

  3. Intergenerational Relationships: It fosters open communication about death and legacy, bridging generational gaps. It also helps children manage their parents' estates more smoothly, reducing potential conflicts and stress.

  4. Personal Reflection: It encourages individuals to reflect on their lives and the meaning of their possessions, promoting self-awareness and personal growth.

  5. Legacy Planning: It involves planning for the future, ensuring that loved ones are not burdened with managing an individual's possessions posthumously, which reflects a desire for thoughtful legacy planning.

Discussing death cleaning with family members can be challenging due to emotional and practical considerations. Challenges include:

  1. Emotional Difficulty: The topic can evoke sadness or discomfort, as it deals with mortality and loss.
  2. Differing Opinions: Family members may have different views on what to keep, discard, or donate.
  3. Privacy Concerns: Some items may be private or embarrassing, leading to concerns about how to handle them.

To approach these conversations:

  1. Start Early: Begin the conversation when everyone is emotionally ready, not just when a crisis arises.
  2. Be Respectful and Open: Listen to everyone's opinions and feelings, and express your own respectfully.
  3. Use a Neutral Setting: Choose a comfortable, neutral environment for the discussion.
  4. Consider a Mediator: If emotions run high, a neutral third party can facilitate the conversation.
  5. Be Practical: Discuss practical aspects like storage, disposal, and potential costs.
  6. Focus on the Positive: Emphasize how death cleaning can relieve stress for loved ones and simplify your life.

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