Ask Not: The Kennedys and the Women They Destroyed

The Kennedy family's culture of silence and secrecy significantly contributed to the mistreatment of women. This culture, characterized by a reluctance to discuss personal matters publicly, allowed for the normalization of harmful behaviors. It shielded the Kennedy men from accountability, as they could hide their actions behind the family's reputation and power. This secrecy also silenced the women, preventing them from speaking out about their experiences, which in turn reinforced the cycle of mistreatment. Additionally, the Kennedy family's control over information often led to the manipulation and distortion of narratives, further victimizing the women involved. The combination of silence, secrecy, and control created an environment where women were vulnerable to mistreatment and the perpetrators were rarely held responsible.

The women in the book navigated complex relationships with Kennedy men through a mix of strategies and emotional resilience. Many, like Jackie Bouvier Kennedy, sought to maintain their dignity and independence, often by focusing on their careers and personal growth. Others, like Mary Richardson Kennedy, clung to their relationships despite abuse, while still others, like Joan Kennedy, found solace in activism and support groups. Some, like Marilyn Monroe, struggled with loneliness and insecurity, turning to alcohol and drugs for comfort. Many women, including Mimi Beardsley Alford and Diana de Vegh, kept their relationships with Kennedy men secret to protect their own reputations. Some, like Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, tried to adapt to their new roles as Kennedy wives, while others, like Rosemary Kennedy, were largely ignored by their powerful family. Overall, the women in the book employed a range of coping mechanisms, from silence and secrecy to personal growth and activism, to navigate their challenging relationships with Kennedy men.

The women in this book both challenged and conformed to expectations placed upon them as Kennedy women in complex ways. Conformity was evident in their roles as supportive wives and mothers, often prioritizing their husbands' and children's needs over their own. They were expected to uphold the Kennedy image, which often meant maintaining a public persona of elegance and grace, despite personal struggles.

However, many women also challenged these expectations. Jackie Kennedy Onassis, for instance, pursued a career after her husband's death, becoming a successful editor. Joan Kennedy found her voice in advocacy for women's rights and against her husband's infidelities. Mary Richardson Kennedy and Kick Kennedy fought for recognition and justice for their sister Rosemary, who suffered from mental disabilities due to her father's actions. These women's actions demonstrated their ability to break free from traditional Kennedy roles and assert their independence and agency.

The book contributes significantly to understanding power dynamics and gender in American history and politics by highlighting the experiences of women whose lives were deeply affected by the Kennedy men. It reveals the ways in which these men, often celebrated, wielded power over women, leading to abuse, manipulation, and even tragedy. The book challenges the traditional narrative of the Kennedy family, showing how their actions and legacies have been shaped by patriarchal and misogynistic attitudes. It underscores the systemic nature of these issues, demonstrating how power dynamics have historically influenced political and social structures, and how gender has been a critical factor in shaping these dynamics. By focusing on the individual stories of these women, the book provides a nuanced perspective on the intersection of power, gender, and American history.